I like my burgers well done
i wish somebody was swoopin for my booty
it’s been a year since mr x almost shot harry styles
How to know which boy you like:
1. Get very drunk
2. You will cry about the boy you like
I M LISTENING TO THE SANTA BABY COVER BY MICHAEL BUBLE AND HE FUCKING
CHANGED THE LYRICS TO “SANTA BUDDY”
IM LAUGHIGN SO HARD
NO HOMO SANTA
my Dad makes dad jokes but because hes a physics teacher theyre not common dad jokes
"hey dad, whats up?"
"Up is a directional vector with no force"
can’t wait for the generation of grandmas with winged eyeliner
*puts my ipod on shuffle and skips every song until i get one i was hoping for*
marijuana does awful things to people like forcing them to talk about how much they smoke it on every single fucking social network every single fucking day
petition to make young adult authors stop writing about girls whose lives change when they meet a boy
When she saw him time slowed to a stop. He was so perfect and she knew her life would never be the same because she had finally found him. The one. The first boy she would ever kill.
IT’S 1:19 A.M. MY COUSIN JUST SENT ME THIS PICTURE WITH NO CAPTION I’M FREAKING THE FUCK OUT
"butter me up, sunshine"
my wallet is empty just like my soul